2012年10月4日 星期四

英語幽默故事分享

. 2012年10月4日 星期四

The patient is adamant. "Doc, I need a liver transplant, a kidney transplant, a heart transplant, a cornea transplant, a spleen transplant, a pancreas trans. . ." "What makes you think you need all these?" Well, replied the patient, "My boss said if I wanted to keep my job I needed to get reorganized."

這個病人顯得很堅決。“醫生,我需要做肝臟移植、腎臟移植、心臟移植、角膜移植、脾臟移植、胰腺移植和。。。” “你為什麼認為你需要做這麼多移植手術?”病人回答:“哦,是這樣,我的老闆說如果我這個人不重新組裝的話,就別想保住我的工作!”


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The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog. "It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?"Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?"

狗也知道這個諺語嗎?一個小男孩非常不喜歡狗狂叫的樣子。“沒有關係,”一位先生說,“不用害怕,你知道這條諺語嗎:‘吠狗不咬人。’”“啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道嗎?”

3
 A cat and her four kittens ran into a large dog. When the kittens cowered, the cat let out a series of loud barks, scaring the dog away.Turning to her kittens, the cat said, "You see how important it is to know a second language."
一天,一隻貓媽媽領著4隻小貓在路上走,卻遇到了一隻大狗。小貓們嚇的蜷縮成了一團,這時貓媽媽吼出了一連串的汪汪聲,大狗被嚇跑了。貓媽媽轉過身來對幾個小貓說,“孩子們,看看掌握一門外語是多麼的重要呀!”


趣味英語
1.Outside a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary, we hear you coming."

一家消聲器店外:"根本不用預約,我們聽到你來了!"

2.Outside a hotel: "Help! We need inn-experienced people."

酒店門外:"幫幫忙!我們缺少常住小酒館的人。"

3.On a desk in a reception room: "We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left."

接待室的桌上:"三個一輪!我們要毫不留情地趕走第三個推銷員!注:第二個剛剛離開。"

4.In a veterinarians waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes, Sit! Stay!"

獸醫的候診內:"稍候5分鐘。趴下,別動!"

5.At the electric company: "We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't you will be."

在電氣公司:"如果你送來鈔票,我們會很高興;如果你不送,就會被斷電。"

6.On the door of a computer store: "Out for a quick byte."

電腦專賣店門上:"出去找一個更快的字節。"

7.In a restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry, come on in and get fed up."

餐館櫥窗:"別餓著肚子傻呆在那兒,進來吧,吃頓飽飯!"

8.Inside a bowling alley: "Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop."

在保齡球館:"保持安靜,我們需要傾聽大頭針落地。"

9.In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully, we'll wait."

在墓地的前院:"開車當心,我們會等著你的。"

10.In a counselors office: "Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional.

在諮詢師辦公室:"變老是由上帝控制的,變聰明是由自己控制的。
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thanks for sharing..

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