1.When Was Rome Built? 羅馬是什麼時候建成的？
Teacher: When was Rome built?
Tom: At night.
Teacher: Who told you that?
Tom: You did. You said Rome wasn't built in a day.
2.He Knows the Answer 他知道答案
Teacher: Can you tell me anything about the great scientists of the 18th century?
Pupil: Yes, sir, I can. They are all dead.
3.Where do babies come from? 小孩從哪裡來？
I asked my father where babies come from.
He says you download them from the Internet.
4.An Essential Correction 實質性的糾正
Teacher: Walter, why don’t you wash your face? I can see what you had for breakfast this morning.
Walter: What was it?
Walter: Wrong, teacher. That was yesterday.
5. I Don’t Feel Like Getting into an Argument 我不想爭論
“Gerald,” asked the teacher, “what is the shape of the earth?”
“It's round,” answered Gerald.
“How do you know it's round?” continued the teacher.
“All right, it’s square then,” he replied, “ I really don't feel like getting into an argument about it!”
6.Three Reasons 三個理由
Teacher: Bob, give me three reasons why you know the Earth to be round.
Bob: Mum says so, Dad says so, and you say so!
7.Who Should be Given the Present? 禮物該給誰？
A father of five came home with a toy, summoned his children and asked
which one of them should be given the present, “Who is the most obedient,
never talks back to mother and does everything he or she is told?” he
inquired. There was silence and then a chorus of voices: “You play with it,
大家都不吭聲。過了一會兒，孩子們異口同聲地說：“爸爸，您玩兒吧。” 更多開心更多歡笑就在《n詞酷》！ ！ ！
8.Big Head 大腦袋
“All the kids make fun of me,” The boy cried to his mother. “They say I
have a big head.”
“Don't listen to them,” his mother consoled. “You have a beautiful
head. Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes.”
“Where's the shopping bag?”
“I haven't got one, use your hat.”
9.To Open the Door 開門
Leaving my four-year-old son in the house, I ran out to throw something in
the trash. When I tried to open the door to get back inside, it was locked.
I knew that insisting that my son open the door would have been resulted
in an hour-long battle of wills. So in a sad voice, I said, “Oh, too badYou just
locked yourself in the house.”
The door opened at once.
10.Bedtime Prayers 睡前禱告詞
Julie was saying her bedtime prayers. “Please God,” she said, “Make
Naples the capital of Italy.”
Her mother interrupted and said. “Julie, why do you want God to make
Naples the capital of Italy?”
And Julie replied, “Because that’s what I put in my geography exam!”